It’s been a month since my move back to the fatherland. Things sure have changed. For starters, everyone addresses me as Mr. Kortas or even funnier, Mr. Slawek. I am not used to that. Mr. Kortas is my father… and Mr. Slawek just doesn’t make sense. Call me Slawek. I suppose this ages me a little as well. Suddenly, someone calling me Mr. Kortas because I am clearly older than they are makes me sad. I’m thinking of going to the only local Starbucks (our city has one of 2 Starbucks’ in Poland) and ordering a Mocha just to be called Slawek. Even though our culture does not allow for direct name calling, Starbucks still writes and then calls out just first names here. No Mr. Slawek.
First couple of weeks were spent mostly at the house and visiting relatives. Only after I was able to pick up my dads ’91 BMW that I started driving around the city. Driving a stick shift isn’t a problem, driving around the city with a map isn’t a problem. However trying to find a street name anywhere is a huge problem simply cause there are no signs. I can only imagine what real foreigners must feel like when they know a street name and can’t find a sign. Fortunately my city is the second most congested city in Europe according to TomTom so I have plenty of time to figure out where it is that I am. My 1.6 liter engine is also just barely enough to get the car going, so no worries on speeding, or making that yellow light, or passing anyone…but at a stop light, it idles like a real beast!
I am still trying to figure out a lot of paperwork here, but will slowly start looking for a job. Money has a funny way of disappearing very very fast when there’s no pay check coming in.
Eric Galpin has requested that I update a few details about my new life here:
Please post new photos of your home, hot new wife, a sunset, a polish sausage, the street that was torn up 4times, a road sign in polish, your car in your driveway with Californian plates, & you your smile. Thanks.
I will try to update all of the above mentioned items shortly.
The Polish Magician 
Oh my! This made my day. I now have a place to rip on my favorite Pollock. I was actually a little gitty when I clicked the polish magician link.
Well lets begin. That girls real boyfriend is going to be pissed when he sees this blog and that you claim to be her boyfriend, secondly I don’t believe that girls that pretty exist in Poland. Every picture I see is of a woman that looks 90, has a handkerchief tied on their head, and a dress that goes down to their ankles. I always assumed that these women were actually in their late 20’s and that drinking vodka since the age of 4 was the cause of this.
On another note, I have mental images of euro road trip the movie as I read your blog. The car that can’t climb hills, lack of street signs, It makes me Imagine the part of the movie where they end up in eastern Europe. Tell me, Is Miami Vice new number one show?
I’m glad that Starbucks is America’s stamp on Poland. They didn’t have a Starbucks until a year ago, but progress is being made there. You can make a killing in Poland updating the place. Try to introduce the country to Compact Disk technology, motion activated doors, and auto flush toilets. Just remember to not go too big too fast. You don’t want to be called a witch. Who knows, you do a couple of these things and you might be the new president of Poland. There is an opening.
Seriously, I’m glad your doing well, I hope your shipping container arrives soon, and I bet the job thing will work its self out.
Did you apply at Starbucks? And are the drink sizes still as confusing as they are here?